In our, "we need everything now," society people have grown impatient. We hate waiting. It's a hassle to wait for a response to a text message, phone call, or email. There is no reason why we should have to wait for a grade to be posted or sit in the waiting room for the doctor to see us. Aprrentaly, there is just no valid reason to wait.
Which probably explains this recent aversion to dating. Dating equates to time! Time to figure out if you really like this person, time to go/plan dates, TIME, TIME, TIME!
Which probably explains this recent aversion to dating. Dating equates to time! Time to figure out if you really like this person, time to go/plan dates, TIME, TIME, TIME!
Now-a-days the process goes like this:
1. You like me?
2. Good I like you too!!
3. You want to be my boy/girlfriend
4. Great! We're a couple now!
Hopefully, you all see the problem with this! There needs to be a 2.5 and 3.5!! Just because you're physically attracted to someone doesn't mean you're compatible. Hence, taking your time to date (the 2.5.) People need to take time to figure these issues out.
Once you have accomplished that taxing and time-consuming feat one is then apt to decide if you two should enter into couple-hood (which, mind you, requires more time than courtship.) Time needs to be extended on this part as well (the 3.5.) Figure out if you two are really ready to be committed and have the time to extend to each other. This way you both have the same/similar expectations going into the relationship.
I know this all sounds tedious but wouldn't you rather spend time figuring these things out as oppossed to dealing with a tumultuous or failed relationship?
With all that being said, I just have one question...
This post is so good and so important! My boyfriend and I just broke up because we skipped step 2.5. We liked each other, were physically attracted to one another, made time for one another but simply put, we just were not compatible. I never believed in this compatibility thing until this relationship -- I always believed that if you liked one another you can work things out. But if you're not compatible there are certain things that are just fundamentally so different that they would put a strain on the relationship. My ex and I still like one another, and are attracted to one another but we realized since we skipped step 2.5 we would end up hurting one another alot more in the long run.
ReplyDelete(sorry this turned out way longer than I thought it would)
xx
josie
www.straightNOchase.com