And just like that.....

I have completed year two in my PhD program (TURN UHHH!!) and during that time I did not pause to complete another post. Needless to say, this academic year has been a struggle. And I don't mean, "oh look at these readings" type of struggle. Although there was plenty of that. I mean like, "I don't know if I'm going to make it out of bed today" struggles. I recently realized that I winter time is a difficult time for me. Being in Michigan can really test your ability to survive endless days without sunlight. I kid you not, I'm pretty sure the sun didn't come out for the entire month of January. How is that even real? Thanks to Facebook memories I noticed that my winter month statues are sad and this winter hit me like a ton of bricks. I do not mean that metaphorically, I genuinely felt that I was carrying additional weight around with me. Thanks to a survey I took for the school about mental health, I talked to my therapist about depression, a...

And with that, it's a wrap! As of December 18, 2015, I completed my first semester as a Doctoral Student at the University of Michigan. This semester had a steep learning curve and I came to the realization that I was suffering from a slight case of 'the burnout.'  My intention was not to enter a doctoral program after completing my Masters program.  The opportunity presented itself and I graciously accepted the challenge.  This was before I realized that it take me an additional month to complete my final internship.  This left me with no real break in between.  Couple this with moving into and furnishing a new place and Voila...BURNOUT!! In light of my self-diagnosed disorder I procrastinated WAY too much during the semester.  Waiting until the literal last minute before beginning an assignment that I knew about months in advance.  Or studying a little too late in (and by a little I mean a lot too late).  I was disappointed in myself a coupl...

When I first started this blog I was at a crossroads in life. I had just graduated from the University of Michigan with BA in Sociology and had no idea what was next for me. I was dealing with such inner turmoil and really needed to focus on myself. I fought against this. Instead choosing to berate myself for not being on the same level as my friends were. I lived in shame and despair not willing face the demons that haunted my sleep. With much love and support I came to terms with the darkness I ran from and with that positive things started to happen: 1. I applied for a Masters program 2. Moved away 3. Ended a toxic relationship 4. Lost a "friend" 5. Went back to therapy While some of those instances may not sound positive, for me they were. In hindsight can truthfully say that I am where I should be. As of May 7th, I graduated with my Masters (although I still have some hours to finish for my internship), and have been accepted into a PhD program. Me!!! In four...

It has been mighty long time since I have been in this space. Life has gotten the best of me and I let myself get caught up in the whirlwind. In the midst of this cyclone of life, I didn't take care of me. I made several strides to better myself. I am still in school and have been doing extremely well. School is honestly the only thing I have been excelling at. In light of this I intend on making strides toward bettering myself. I am attempting to come up with ways in which to do so. Here is what I have thus far: 1. Yoga/physical activity: I have always been intrigued with the beauty and art that is yoga. One of the things that truly speaks to me is the foundation of loving thine self and doing what is best for you. My progression has be slow but I am growing in confidence. I am open and willing to any suggestions for growing a home practice. My new positions in life have offered me quite a bit of sitting. My body is not used to being sedentary, because of this I am constant...

I have bouts of self doubt. At times it can be really bad. I've been working on re-learning to love myself. Well to love myself in general. I can't actually remember a time where I did. Which is actually hard to admit. Like, there are honestly times when I genuinely don't like myself. And I don't mean as I person. I think I'm an amazing human being with a great personality. I'm funny, intelligent, compassionate, and understanding. But when it comes to looks...it's a completely different story.  I can look at a picture of myself and think to myself that I just took a good picture not that I'm just beautiful. People look at me all the time and tell me that I'm gorgeous, beautiful, sexy or whatever other adjective that women strive to be called. I look in the mirror and see none of that. Because of this belief I am convinced that nobody will find me attractive and want to be with me. Sound crazy? Yeah. I know.  I can't help the way I fee...

Not quite sure. I made my big move. Currently residing in MI. Just registered for my first semester of graduate classes. About to put in work for a real grown up people job. Been doing hella thinking. Making cuts. A little confused. Stressed. Blah.

Dr. Seuss was a genius. Get. Into. It.  “I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living." “Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.”  “A person's a person, no matter how small.”  “Being crazy isn't enough.” “I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!” “Why fit in when you were born to stand out?”  “If things start happening, don't worry, don't stew, just go right along and you'll start happening too.” “You’ll miss the best things if you keep your eyes shut.” “I'm afraid that sometimes you'll play lonely games too. Games you can't win 'cause you'll play against you.”  “I know, up on top you are seeing great sights, but down here at the bottom we, too, should have r...